Fuck You Maura Kelly, Stare at this Fat

By now I'm sure you have all heard that "writer" Maura Kelly has written an incredibly hateful article about fat people on MarieClaire.com. Apparently the fat actors on Mike & Molly are so fat that the idea of watching them kiss one another makes her ill. To quote Maura Kelly, because lord knows I won't do justice to her words

"I think I'd be grossed out if I had to watch two characters with rolls and rolls of fat kissing each other ... because I'd be grossed out if I had to watch them doing anything. To be brutally honest, even in real life, I find it aesthetically displeasing to watch a very, very fat person simply walk across a room."

It astounds me that Marie Claire or Maura Kelly didn't anticipate the shit storm that the post engendered. Seriously, this shit is bananas and everyone is talking about it. Eventually Maura felt the need to offer up what has to be amongst the worst apology I've ever heard where she basically says I'm sorry, except that these people are really fat so I'm not actually that sorry. Don't believe me? Here are her words

"In my post, I was talking about a TV show that features people who are not simply a little overweight, but appear to be morbidly obese."

Oh ok, so you're sorry for hating on people who are fat, but folks who are really, really Fat don't actually deserve an apology. On a personal level I find it amusing that what she hates the most about the show (the uber fatties) is to me the only redeeming thing about the show. I watch the insipid show just to watch death fatties getting it on.

Reading her words I felt as though someone had slapped me in my face. But in a way I have to thank Maura for being so bold about her hate in a way few people are. She didn't pretend to hate fat people because of concern for our health or attempt to couch it some paternalistic, I know better than you belief. She simply hates us because we're "gross" which I imagine is something that a lot of people feel, but most wouldn't say out loud. On the upside, Maura's hatred is so extreme that it has really brought attention to the issue of fat acceptance and folks all across the county are calling her out for her bullshit.

One of t

he saddest things for me about this is that it appeared on Marie Claire's website. I've been a subscriber for years, it seemed to me to be the only fashion magazine with good, progressive politics. Their editor-in-chief Joanna Coles isn't apologizing so I'll be putting my money where my mouth is and cancelling my subscription.

Yesterday I posted on Facebook that I wish that I knew where Maura Kelly vacationed so a group of me and my fatty friends could put on the smallest, string bikinis we could find and make out in front of her. Since I can't imagine she'll be getting many writing jobs anytime soon and money will be tight, perhaps I'll stage a kiss-in outside her Brooklyn apartment. Until then Maura here are some shots of me and my rolls. In a bikini. In public. Smiling. I hope I make you violently ill.

Until we meet at beach, all I have to say to you is